Farewell to Ottawa

This has been one of the most amazing times of my young life. I have experienced and grown so much. Who I am today has been shaped by this place. But it is not my home.
Friday night we watched Forrest Gump and I saw in the film the beautiful landscapes, history, and monuments are in America. The past three months I have been consumed with Canada. My work, school, and social interaction depended on it. But now I am done and I can look home and see my path. America is where I'm meant to be. I love Canada, but more as a friend and not like a parent. America is home and it is where my work lies. In the film I saw America and I saw that it has so much good in it and I believe it is worth fighting for. Whether it be as a father, a worker, or a politician, I will do my best to protect America and make her a better place.
My course is set. I'm not looking back. I'm coming home.

One Week

Winter Wonderland

Winter is setting in here. It is 15 below right now (Celsius) and windchill puts it at more like -20 or so. We have a few inches of snow that stick around and more to come in the next few days. It's beautiful through the window.

Ottawa

I know I've told many people on Facebook, emails, and otherwise quite often that Ottawa is beautiful, but I fail to expand on that. I suppose the fact that it is the convergence of a number of variables that makes it a great place and I don't usually want to take the time to explain it all. To put it another way, the beauty of Ottawa is the sum of many parts and usually tell the sum rather than the equation. So I'm writing it here and now.
Ottawa does not feel like an overwhelming big city. I am from the country, but I readily felt at home here. The reason is because the city keeps ample park space, open paths, and sits on the convergence of a few bodies of water. There are tall buildings that can be intimidating, but you don't feel bound by them. You get the feeling of space. This is also in large part due to the fact that Ottawa established a green belt surrounding it. The city is not allowed to sprawl out beyond the belt and any developments and suburbs must be beyond that space. It really keeps the city feeling open.
Ottawa also is full of plant life. Fall out here is absolutely beautiful because there are so many trees. Having that element breaks up the monotony and bleakness of endless buildings and high-rises. There is also ample park space that is good for ultimate frisbee or dogs, which there is a surprisingly large population of. The fact is that more people can have dogs here because there is enough space to do so. So Ottawa is defined by openness and greenness (or many colors in the fall).
Another part of this is that Ottawa sits on the convergence of the Ottawa River and the Rideau River and has the Rideau Canal running straight through the middle of the city. That also adds to the aforementioned elements of openness and naturality. These all serve to break up the gray and numbing coldness of a city. It really feels like a place to live, not just exist.
Ottawa is also really nice and easy to get around. Especially in our area, Centretown, the streets are all on a grid and there are distinctive landmarks to give you direction. I found it to be really accessible and conducive to walking. I have rarely felt the need to have a car. Walking is simple and most everything I need or want is within walking distance. Everything. I even finally found a Dairy Queen within walking distance (phew!).
Also, walking around here is enjoyable because the sights are so nice. In the fall, the trees were beautiful and there was colour everywhere. There are so many pretty and really nice houses around here. Often they aren't terribly fancy, but there are many brick houses with touches of elegance or even grandeur at times. I will miss seeing all these cool houses. I've begun to take them for granted. Also, there are historic, or at least very old, sites dispersed throughout the city. In fact, I live in one. There's also statues, memorials, embassies, and the glorious and beautiful Parliament buildings. It's a much different look than the American capital which speaks of Rome and a new renaissance of civilization. This is more traditioned and weathered appearance. The buildings are a neo-Gothic style, which means they look more like cathedrals. They certainly inspire reverence, which is scary because they are the altar of the nation-state and often inspire more awe than our churches. I've never been a big fan of expensive churches that seem a poor allocation of funds, but perhaps our church buildings should be a part of the worship experience. Our buildings are the visible representation of our reverence to the Almighty God -- shouldn't they look the part? I digress.
Ottawa also has a good supply of museums, arts centres, and various other attractions to keep inquisitive college students busy. There is the War Museum, Bytown Museum, Museum of Civilization, National Art Gallery, National Arts Centre (interestingly the ugliest building in Ottawa), Parliament buildings, Laurier House, Museum of Nature, and Byward Market (charming open-air market). I'm forgetting some now. Basically there are plenty of opportunities for enlightenment, education, and entertainment.
Unfortunately, our busy schedule often limited our opportunities to appreciate these as this city shuts down after business hours. I'm pretty sure I've seen more cars and people in Lynden on a Sunday before than on some Sundays here. I was surprised how much the city shut down. I didn't expect that in a city like that. New York is the city that never sleeps; Ottawa is well-rested.
I should give a brief note to the Rideau Canal. This waterway stretches 125 miles from Kingston to Ottawa where it empties into the Ottawa river through a set of locks. The canal was built in 1832 and the locks operate pretty much the same as they did back then. It's a very scenic stretch of water lined with paths on each side that make for a beautiful walk, run, or bike. It's a great feature in such a capacity, but it is at its best in the winter, which we will not experience. Once winter has fully set in, the canal freezes over and thousands daily take to the ice to skate around for fun or even for transportation to work. I am disappointed I will not get to experience this part of Ottawa, however, I hear that the iciness of the canal comes at the cost of the iciness of everything else, too.
Our three months here have been the best weather that Ottawa has to offer. It was unseasonably warm for most of our time here and when it cooled down it was still usually sunny and clear, making for a beautiful autumn. The fall colours here are wonderful. When my parents were here, we took a bit of a drive away into the best fall colours there are in the Gatineau Hills. Fall really suits this city. It is just becoming snowy and wintery here as we near our exit. We will get to enjoy some snow and winter and then skip out before it becomes real winter here and this place gets snowed and iced over for three to four months. No joke. The snow can last from mid-November to April. What we are experiencing now is only the beginning, apparently. We really could not have had better weather, excluding some of the humid heat.
Another interesting characteristic of Ottawa is the prevalence of French here. My only experience of Canada before was of the West where French is probably the most forgotten of all the high school subjects. Ottawa looks over the river to Quebec and there is a lot of overlapping especially in the work force. Therefore, signs here are actually in both languages and even events have to be bilingual, such as performances at the National Arts Centre. Even Parliament is conducted bilingually. It is really a great achievement that people can yell across at someone in one language and have them respond in it, then switch to another language and not skip a beat. There is a lot of listening to translation in ear-pieces, but the ability to have yelling matches in two languages is truly fascinating and impressive. It gets frustrating to me, though. I don't know French and it gets old when you can't even understand the words that someone else is saying. I guess I just like to understand things. My pronunciation has improved, but I still don't understand. French is also very hard to understand over the phone. I found this to be difficult at work. The problem is that letters in French words are more like suggestions of direction for the sound. I've actually had to give someone a phone message that I had to explain what the name of the person sounded like, not knowing what to write. Frustrating.
One thing that definitely bothers me about Ottawa is the number of smokers. It's terrible. Walking to work past all the people on smoke breaks and behind the smokers is gross and makes it hard to breathe. Maybe there's too much stress in this city, but there is definitely a smoking problem.
These minor frustrations don't really add up to much in my assessment of Ottawa, at least in comparison with all that it has going for it. I really have come to love this city. For a country used to open space and quiet towns, I could not have had a better place to live. If I had to live in a city like Seattle or Vancouver I would have quickly tired of it, but I have not grown weary of living here. It just doesn't feel like a big city and I suppose it really isn't that big in comparison with Seattle or Vancouver, but it has maintained a high level of quality, no matter the size comparisons. I wanted to write out the setting of my experience here to let you all understand what a great experience this was aside from the amazing education, working experience, and accommodations. This city embodies the best of Canada and has been a wonderful place to live for the past three months and I will miss it.

A Glimpse Inside

The Cracks of Doom and the Road Less Travelled

I have been wondering the past week or so what will become of me after this experience. I am so excited to go home, but I wonder whether I will be able to let Ottawa go.
A couple weeks ago I had a dream that I had come home and I was walking through home excited to be there, but it did not feel like home. I cannot describe the feeling to you, but it was almost tangible the feeling that I wasn't at peace and at home. It was scary.
I'm getting close to the end of school now and more and more often now I am casting glances towards the horizon. This semester has definitely altered that vision -- and this is what concerns me.
Here in Ottawa there is a great deal of power. Not only do I see it and participate in it, but I can touch it as well. The buildings here are magnificent and being in them and seeing the workings and participating in the workings is intoxicating. On a daily basis, some of the most important and powerful persons in this strong country fill these grand halls. You can see them, hear them, even talk with them. What's more, if you know the right people and get your foot in the right door, you could be on the fast track to becoming one of the powerful persons. There are many people on the Hill, whether staff or Members who are really quite young, not really that much older than me. What do you think that does to who's about to graduate and loves politics?
So I've been wrestling with these ideas and was especially challenged by my last class, which was with Calvin Townsend. He directly noted the intoxication with power you could get here and expressed his concern for us about it. He's right. I see it in myself and others. We're hooked on it. Name-dropping, shmoozing, insider knowledge. We're getting a nose for it.
The dangerous part about being in a place where there are many opportunities to get ahead and achieve is that -- I could do it. I am smart. I am capable. I love it. It gives me a buzz. I'm already thinking about what steps I can take in the next year to move on up. Having been here and mingled with people, not unlike or much more capable than me, who are doing this stuff, I know I'm not that far off getting in the mix. It could happen to me.
But should I? Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. Why would I be doing it? I have good intentions. Good morals. I'm a good person. I would work to do good things with the power. But would that be what was driving me? Because when I think about achieving in the world of politics, I don't get a buzz from the opportunity to do some good things with the power, the power and achievement themselves account for my intoxication. I've even considered just fooling around with politics for a while when I'm young, if only just to have a cool experience, but will I be able to stop. Will I just end up being the kind to say, "I can quit anytime I want." Once I have slipped on the Ring of Gyges, will I be able to take it off and give it up?
(Nerd warning)
Or will I be Gandalf who, when faced with the prospect of receiving Sauron's Ring of Power, resisted, saying, "I dare not take it. Not even to keep it safe. Understand, Frodo. I would take this ring from a desire to do good...but through me, it would wield a power to great and terrible to imagine." The Ring represents Power. Power can be used for good, but even the stoutest heart can falter and give in to its charms if given enough time.
So here I am, a world of possibility before me and tremendous opportunity for achievement and status. Do I truly want this? Will this fill me? Or will I just go from fix to fix? If I begin down the road, will my heart remain true? Can it remain true? Or can this really be used for good? Dare I cast my fortunes into the Cracks of Doom? Can I live a quiet life having felt power and status or will I be forever restless? Or will I be a Gollum and become consumed by the desire for it?
No. I can't become attached to it. It will consume me. I must walk away. It must be a course that is given to me from above, not something I pursue. It actually scares me to say that. A voice inside says, "What are you doing, you need to be pursuing this and planning out your way upward?" I just fear that it will become my initiative and I'll be building my Tower of Babel, hoping and expecting that God will bless it. "I'll just start it to get God going on it." I don't think that it should be that way.
I need to examine my heart before I decide to pursure politics any further. It is simply too dangerous and intoxicating to just play with.

This is all near my house!